not sure where to start here, but i've made some decisions today. or at least had a revelation. i've been super stressing about how much and when this little boy eats and sleeps. i'm one of those people who pumps and nurses because i have to know exactly how much food he's getting. i did the same with my daughter. except now i'm worried he's getting too much (instead of not enough). i can remember rocking my daughter (now almost 4 years) to sleep in her rocking chair and instead of gazing lovingly into her angelic eyes.. counting the number of rocks it took to get her to fall asleep. and i'v e recently realized that now i have been spending every waking hour trying to get him to go back to sleep.
he's cranky cause he's hungry (and i'm hungry) and i'm driving myself nuts trying to make my two month old, eat at 7,10, and 1. and take 3 2 1/2 hour naps (like the book says), and writing it all down to to confirm what a failure i am. staring at myself in the mirror with bags under my eyes (and his) after wasting a whole day. i remember tales of one mom, who actually took all naps with the child laying on top of her (for however long she would sleep) because thats the only way the child would stay asleep.
i cant do it.
so moving forward ive decided instead try to figure out how to keep him (and me) happy while he is awake. i'm not throwing my schedule out of the window completely. just maybe not being so super obsessive (possessed) about it. I will feed him when he's hungry. let him sleep when he is sleepy (and falls alseep).
and the moment i let go. he slept for 5 hours straight. no, last night. really he did!!
now after hour three, i was standing there with a mirror under his nose until he woke up. but thats another story for another day:-)
look at those cheeks! yes, he is eating me out of house and home...